Saber Commotion
by Charon the Sabercat
Summary: It's a rewrite of an old classic! Click here to read the REWRITE of "Saber Commotion!" Follows the same storyline, some changes.
1. Charon Meets Kitty

Saber Commotion  
  
Charon started the day like any other saber cat. She bent down tentatively and carefully scooped a vase of water out of the closest oasis. She purred to herself, "Imagine; lead huntresses in training never have to do this kind of stuff. Well, it's all for the best. I would've liked to have Nai- Nai teach me though."  
  
Nai-Nai was Charon's grandmother. She was the leader of her pride, and she did an excellent job of leading at that. They always had enough food, water, and clothing; and they were never troubled by hunters or (shudder) Sand Maggots.  
  
Charon gripped the vase like a human child would his favorite teddy bear and trotted back to Nai-Nai. Nai-Nai was pale and gray haired, and her dulled and scuffed with age. But she had a way with weapons, and had been raising Charon ever since her mother had left with another male to start a new pride. One thing she and Charond didn't have in common with other saber cats, though, is that they knew how to use scythes.  
  
"Hello, my little cactus flower!" hollered Nai-Nai as the little 10-year- old Charon bounced into sight.  
  
Charon smiled cheerily, taking time to look at her reflection in the water vase she was holding. Her skin was orange, not the usual gray or red of most desert dwelling sabercats (this she inherited from her father, whoever he was). Her feet were too small to support her weight properly on the sands, and her hands were extremely paw-like, with stubby fingers and hardly any thumb. Her tail was too long, and her eyes where green instead of blue. Charon never really minded this, though; Nai-Nai had taught her well, telling her that looks can be deceiving. It's what's inside of you that counts. What this meant, Charon never knew, but she did get the point that appearance is not the most important thing in the world.  
  
Nai-Nai stroked Charon's hair and took the water vase from her arms. Charon pricked her ears and smiled again, showing tiny fangs. Nai-Nai laughed and ran her claws through Charon's tangled mane of red locks, reminded of the days of when her hair was blonde underneath her Lead Huntress headdress.  
  
They walked back to the pride's area together, talking of the early day and future hunts. The pride area was simply a section of the desert made of little stone dwellings stacked upon another, like an apartment building. There were three fire pits, one main one and two smaller ones. The main one was for the adults and Lead Huntress, which was Nai-Nai. One small fire pit was for children. The other was for the eldest ones, and little babies. Many of the shelters were stone, but some were cloth, for the mothers-to- be. This was so the babies born would have a soft outlook on life. A large caldron sat in the center of the pride area, where most of the water was kept. They shared this area with a few desert scavengers, which helped them hunt for food.  
  
A large female came up to Charon and Nai-Nai. Charon recognized her as a Lead Huntress in training by her age, wardrobe, and tone of voice. Her name was Jdo-Jdo. She stood taller than both Charon and Nai-Nai by a few inches. Her dark gray skin was amplified by her leather-strap armor, and her sharp blues eyes could cut a person down faster than Charon or Nai-Nai's scythe. Her long, blonde hair was currently housing a dying cactus flower.  
  
"Did you get the water, Mother?" asked Jdo-Jdo in an arrogant tone of voice. She was Charon's aunt.  
  
"No need to trouble yourself," said Nai-Nai with a smirk. "I have it, Jody."  
  
"I told you NEVER to call me Jody! That name is too human for anyone's taste!" roared Jdo-Jdo.  
  
"Not Nai-Nai's. She can say it," answered Charon. "I can say it too, Aunt Jody!"  
  
Jdo-Jdo growled as she took the water vase from Nai-Nai.  
  
"May the gods forbid you have any children, Charon," whispered Jdo-Jdo.  
  
"May the gods forbid you have another kid who has my name!" answered Charon.  
  
"Now, little cactus flower, don't make fun of Jharon like that," giggled Nai-Nai.  
  
"Well, he did steal my nam-" started Charon, but the ground started to rumble. Nai-Nai braced herself while Charon got her scythe ready.  
  
Suddenly, the ground opened a small ways away from the main fire pit. A huge blast of yellow, swirling energy exploded from its depths. Another blast of energy exploded from the ground beside them.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEE!!!!!!"  
  
Charon screamed as Nai-Nai grabbed her and ran. All of the other saber cats started running towards them, screaming and howling and crying for mercy. A few desert scavengers, startled by the uproar, where flying overhead.  
  
Nai-Nai screamed over the uproar, "EVERYONE, INTO THE CANYON AS FAST AS YOU CAN!"  
  
A desert scavenger swooped down to Nai-Nai's face. The aged cat ordered the clawed vulture, "Get Charon out of here!"  
  
Two scavengers picked Charon up by her shoulders and lifted her off of the ground. Charon looked back to Nai-Nai, teary eyed and confused.  
  
"Find me after the storm!" Nai-Nai yelled to her granddaughter.  
  
"OKAY!" Charon answered, still not understanding, before the scavengers carried her out of earshot.  
  
The scavengers carried Charon for a long ways, communicating to eachother through chirps and moans. Charon fell asleep despite the strained feeling in her shoulders, and at some point in time-  
  
The scavengers gave up on her and dropped her.  
  
*****  
  
Charon landed with a thud miles away from her pride area. Shaking her head, she looked around and saw a large, stone archway was above her. Lut Gholen was inscribed on it. It must've been one of those human areas that Jdo-Jdo had tried to warn her about. Charon, having never seen a human (or much else besides sabercats and desert scavengers), didn't know whether they were dangerous or not. But, she had a family to find, so she decided to try to find her way back to her pride area.  
  
She stumbled backwards and bumped into a scarab beetle. Raw electricity ran through her body; she screamed and ran unwittingly into the town. She heard thousands gasp and some scream as she fell to her side, knocked off balance, numb and tingling. Some old lady screaming "Vile Beast!" hit Charon above the head. The frightened sabercat yelped and ran in the opposite direction and straight out of town. As she ran and ran and ran, her fatigue eventually caught up with her; it was as if something was weighing her down, like someone had strapped a boulder to her back.  
  
Charon collasped to her knees, breathing deeply through her mouth. Something tickled her neck, and she lept onto her four paws and turned a 180 to see-  
  
A little girl, no more than three, sitting on the derset sands as peaceful as a rock. Her robes were a dirty brown and in tatters, the name Veronica sewn into the right patch of chest. Her eyes were impossibly big and blue. Her hair was blonde, and she was impossibly big and pale. Charon gasped.  
  
The girl replied, "Lookit the kitty!"  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"  
  
Charon jumped higher than she had ever jumped before, scaring both herself and Veronica.  
  
"Ah! Humans can talk!" she yelped. "I didn't know humans can talk! This's freaky! Nai-Nai!"  
  
Charon tried to run, only to be grabbed around her ankles by little Veronica. She fell over.  
  
"KITTY! Play with kitty!" squealed Veronica, "Kitty, kitty, pretty kitty! Kitty!"  
  
Charon rolled her eyes and stared at Veronica.  
  
"Is 'Kitty' all you can say?" she asked.  
  
"Kitty pretty kitty!"  
  
Charon felt her stomach twist into a knot. If Veronica was here with her, she would have to bring her back home. She couldn't go back to her pride with a human with her. Aunt Jody'd kill her!  
  
"And this kid didn't do anything wrong!" she told herself, surprised at her last remark.  
  
"La la la la kitty. Ah, bug!" screamed Veronica.  
  
Charon jumped as a Sand Maggot crawled from the ground. She readied her scythe. The Sand Maggot wheezed and gasped, "Snrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeelrrraaaaaaaa lyraaaaalllllllllleeeeeeeeee squeeeeeeeeelltthhhhhhhh estttthhhhhhhhrew!!!!!!"  
  
"YIPE!" yelled Charon. Veronica squealed and grabbed a stick. They both beat the Sand Maggot until it exploded. They shared an, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWW!!!"  
  
Charon looked at Veronica blankly and Veronica laughed.  
  
"Well, I guess I gotta take you home now," sighed Charon.  
  
"Kitty want?" asked Veronica, giving her the stick.  
  
"NO! It's got bug gots on it! Ew!" snapped Charon, throwing the stick away. Veronica went and fetched it.  
  
"Quish mo' buggies!" she screamed as she ran back to Charon.  
  
*_%*_%*_%*_%*_%*_%*  
  
"Hey, watsur name?" asked Charon after a while. Veronica was riding on her back.  
  
Veronica pointed to her name embroidered on her robes.  
  
"I can't read your language," sighed Charon, slightly growling.  
  
"Momma say 'point'. I point," recited Veronica, pointing at her name.  
  
"You need a name, then!" Charon giggled. She sketched a pretty, swirly design into the sand with her paw. "How about this name? This name is called 'Piozu', it means 'still learning'."  
  
"Kitty, funny!" squealed Veronica.  
  
"THAT'S IT!" laughed Charon, "I'm callin' you 'Kitty'!"  
  
"KITTY!" yelled Veronica, throwing her arms in the air. Her robes nearly fell off, and Charon sighed.  
  
"Looks like you need knew clothes," she said.  
  
They explored, and finally found a leather breastplate that covered Kitty to her thighs. They also found her crown, and an amulet to wear just because it was pretty. They reached Lut Gholen by some miracle, and they heard two women talking.  
  
"I heard them say it was too much for her. Veronica's mother moved to a place called 'The Rogue Encampment'. She even said she would go and fight some local demon."  
  
"I know, you heard correctly. Poor thing, Veronica was barely even dressed when she was kidnapped by that dreadful abomination of a creature."  
  
"Hey, are you that 'Veronica' thingy?" Charon asked.  
  
"My name Kitty," squealed Kitty, crossing her arms.  
  
"Well, I gotta give you back to your Momma, so I guess we're going to the Rogue's place."  
  
"Momma," sighed Kitty.  
  
Charon lowered her tail and sighed. She knew how Kitty felt. Nai-Nai must've been having a heart attack. Charon missed her grandmother terribly. But, she had to keep going. She was responsible for making sure that Kitty got back to her mother. She sneaked into the town, and slipped through the waypoint, not seen by anyone (expect for maybe a chicken, who Charon chased into the waypoint with her).  
  
The Rogues, never seeing a saber cat, greeted Charon with a small bit of welcome. Even Kashya, who couldn't stand most people, was a cat lover. They gave Charon food and water, and Kitty some decent clothes (she insisted on keeping her breastplate, though). The thought of Kitty's mother nearly went from Charon's mind, but Kitty had to ask.  
  
"Where's Momma?" she pleaded.  
  
"Oh dear," moaned Akara. "Do you mean the woman who came from Jut Gholen?"  
  
"Uh, I think so," Charon nodded.  
  
Many of the Rogues bowed their heads, and Charon knew what was wrong. Kitty didn't.  
  
"She was slain, by Andariel. Warric told us of you and Veronica-"  
  
"KITTY!" they both screamed, simultaneously.  
  
"Kitty, then." Akara straightened her robe. "He told us of you stumbling into town; only pure hearted creatures can enter Lut Gholien."  
  
"Is that how it's pronounced?" asked Charon, her eyes wide.  
  
"No, but I like saying it that way," laughed Akara.  
  
A town portal opened in the middle of town, and Charon jumped in shock.  
  
"Have you never seen a town portal?" Akara asked.  
  
"Nuh-uh!" Charon trotted towards the portal, dragging Kitty behind her with her tail.  
  
Out of the portal stepped Deckard Cain. Although at first his body gave a slight, fearful jerk, he smiled when he saw Charon and Kitty.  
  
"You are not tainted by Diablo. Good. You truly are an inspiration to others of your kind."  
  
"What's a 'Diablo'?" wondered Charon. Kashya explained Charon's story to Cain, and he smiled.  
  
"My friend, you are brave to return Vero- Kitty to her mother before you venture back to your family. The other's will not harm you, I believe."  
  
Another town portal opened, scaring Charon again. Kitty ran and hugged Charon around one ankle. One paladin, a sorceress, a barbarian, a necromancer, and his minions (two skeletons) came through the portal. They looked at Charon with hatred, angered that they could not kill her while within the camp. Except for the paladin.  
  
"HALT, all of you!" he said to his party members. They stopped staring at Charon and started staring at him. The paladin kneeled before the sabercat, causing her to feel... strange. She took a step backward. Kitty hit the paladin with her stick (which she had carried through the whole ordeal), but his armor was so thick he didn't notice. "I am Dakum, the paladin. You are within the encampment, monster of the desert. What brings you here?"  
  
Charon blinked. "I'm helping Kitty find her Momma."  
  
"Kitty!" squealed the toddler.  
  
"I sense not the presence of Diablo in you, monster. Give me your hand for just a moment."  
  
Charon reluctantly gave Dakum her paw, and he closed his eyes and began to chant.  
  
"Oh, great lord of Zakarum, release any bounds of evil that might be holding this girl. Heal, evil monster, Return to peace!"  
  
Dakum gave the bridge of Charon's flat nose a hard jab with his fingers. She recoiled and held her face in pain. "Owee!"  
  
"You are cleansed!" Dakum rejoiced, throwing his hands in the air.  
  
The sorceress behind Dakum rolled her eyes, and the necromancer whispered into her ear, "I think our paladin friend's gone a little nutty."  
  
The barbarian whispered into her other ear. "Been throwin' back a bit too much Holy Water."  
  
"Undoubtedly," mumbled the sorceress.  
  
"I ask you, cleansed cat!" Dakum held out a strong, burly hand. "Will you join us in our quest to fight Diablo?"  
  
Charon blinked again and turned to Kitty. "Do you know who Diablo is?"  
  
"Uh uh," Kitty shook her head.  
  
"If you help us, we'll help you find Kitty's mother's soul!" Dakum coaxed.  
  
She shook his hand in allegiance. 


	2. Walkin' Through the Catacombs

By the time Charon had joined the paladin's party, Kitty had INSISTED on coming. Not even Kashya's mercenaries could keep apart the sabercat and the "Kitty". They would both break into howling fits, so finally they just gave in and let Kitty go with Charon. She would not let anyone take her stick, so Charsi constructed a metal frame to go around the little stick, making Kitty her very own mace. Kitty really liked it.  
  
On the way to Andariel's catacombs, Charon got herself acquainted with Dakum's party.  
  
"I am Sherice," said the sorceress. Sherice wore a flimsy etherial cap and armed herself with a long staff. She wore nothing on her feet other than her normal sandals, and no gloves on her hands. She struggled with the very large quilted armor she was wearing, waiting for the chance to find a coat that fit. She gripped her staff very tightly, eager and anxious to drive the sharp end into the closest beast.  
  
"I am Jordan," said the barbarian. He wore a skull cap, hard leather armor, heavy glooves and boots, and a light belt. He held in his hands two small axes. He walked proudly and with a certain swagger to his hips. Strangely enough, he kept shooting glances over his shoulder at Sherice; Charon caught him doing it several times a minute.  
  
"My name is Niro," coughed Niro. In one hand he held a severed head, and in the other... absolutely nothing. He had not found a weapon he was happy with yet. He too wore hard leather armor and heavy boots, but he told Charon he hated wearing gloves ("They chafe my skin") and belts ("It's like having a really really really weak snake trying to crush me to death ALL THE TIME"). Niro sniffled and sneezed nearly the entire way to Andariel's catacombs; he said he was allergic to Wendigo fur.  
  
Dakum held in one hand a Holy Water sprinkler and in the other a buckler shield. He wore studded leather armor, heavy boots, Chain gloves, and an expensive Sharkskin belt! He wore a special war cap on his head, which he said was different from a regular cap because "It's cured in blood" (Sherice nearly puked when she heard that).  
  
As they stepped into the Catacombs, Dark Ones rushed at them, howling and hooting with Hell's perversion. Charon got into a battle stance, along with her humans. Kitty climbed onto Charon's shoulders, creating a double warrior. Kitty raised her mace.  
  
"Ready!" said Dakum.  
  
The Dark Ones set in.  
  
"Steady!"  
  
Charon growled in a sudden fury.  
  
"GO! GO! GO!"  
  
Charon let out a battle cry along with her compadres as she leaped into the fray.  
  
Sherice sent a fireball at the nearest shaman, killing him. Niro, the necromancer, shouted orders to his minions as they attacked the largest swarm of Dark Ones. Dakum and Jordan took on the stragglers. Charon darted from here to there, slashing the Dark Ones as they tried to sneak attack her partners from behind, while Kitty became a lot of a lookout.  
  
"KAREY!" she screamed, as a single Tainted came and tried to attack Dakum. Charon spun around on her paw and slashed the Tainted. He grunted, and Dakum finished him off.  
  
Sherice opened a door, and a few ghouls rushed at her. She killed them with her trusty fireball.  
  
"Nice," said Jordan, patting her shoulder.  
  
"Thanks," she answered, turning red.  
  
Charon pushed her way through the two warriors, Kitty following while holding Charon's tail.  
  
"Charon!" Dakum called to the cat. "Stay with us! You and Kitty might get lost."  
  
"I know where to go," she purred.  
  
Dakum stared. "How?"  
  
"I know this way is north," Charon pointed in the direction she was walking. "Only makes sense to go this way."  
  
"Ba ba ba ba." Kitty tapped  
  
They kept going until they had reached the third level. Charon had a ring in her pocket; she had found it after a battle in the pocket of a Dark One. She didn't know what it was specifically, but it looked pretty enough to keep.  
  
Charon walked so fast that, eventually, she lost track of her party entirely. She checked her surroundings, made sure she knew what direction "north" was, and turned to Kitty. "Hey, do you know where we are?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Okay." Charon, surprisingly, passed a couple of ghouls without trouble. She would look at them, they'd look back, she'd nod hello, they'd nod back, and they'd be done. This kept on for a while, until she came to one particular, to us familiar, room. A ghoul approached her and tapped her shoulder.  
  
"Hey, cat."  
  
Charon jumped, scooping Kitty in her arms. "Wh-wh-what do you want?"  
  
The ghoul dropped a small potion into Charon's hand. "This's for Andariel. She's behind the big door. Could ya bring it to her for me?"  
  
"Uh... why can't you bring it to her, sir?" Charon asked, forgetting that Andariel was the quote-unquote "bad guy".  
  
"I'm a woman."  
  
"Oops!" Charon blushed. "Sorry, you all look alike!"  
  
"No!" Kitty slapped Charon's temple weakly.  
  
The ghoul pushed Charon to Andariel's door. "Just go, cat, and I'll let you out of the dungeon."  
  
"Okay!" Charon pulled open the door and slipped inside, Kitty clomping along behind her. "I'll be back real quick!"  
  
SLAM!  
  
"No you won't," said the ghoul, retreating back to her hobby of sketching the faces of victims into the floor stones.  
  
***  
  
"Hullo!" Charon bounced into the main chamber, a potion in one hand and a struggling toddler in the other. "Miss Andariel? Stop squirming, Kitty!"  
  
"No no!"  
  
"URGH!" Charon lifted the toddler onto her shoulders, squishing her down roughly. "Are you better now?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Maybe I should've named you 'No'."  
  
Charon heard a thudding noise behind her, and turned her head to see...  
  
Her eyes went wide. Kitty shuddered in fear.  
  
They were face to face with Andariel.  
  
"W-w-well, hello, M-m-m-m-miss And-d-dariel. You look... wonderful t- today," squeaked Charon, her voice getting higher and higher pitched with each word. Andariel growled.  
  
"Pr---preeee---nice lady," shivered Kitty. She was shaking so hard Charon thought she might fall off.  
  
Zombies encircled the young girls.  
  
"Uh... heh heh heh heh heh. Are... uh... these your pride mates?" Charon asked naively.  
  
Andariel rumbled, "They are my minions!" Charon stared at her blades.  
  
"W-w-wow. You kn-kn-know, this p-p-place is nearly on f-f-f-fire. Y-y-you can't be warm in a g-g-g-get up like th-th-th-that."  
  
Andariel roared in anger.  
  
"Shouldn'thavesaidthatShouldn'thavesaidthatShoudn'thavesaidthat!" Both children squealed in fear as they awaited their fate.  
  
Andariel lurched forward, her blades slicing the air as they moved towards them. 


	3. Andariel's Defeat

Andariel's blades sliced the very air as they flung their way towards Charon and Kitty. Charon lept nimbly out of the way, retreating on all fours into the corner of the room. Kitty screamed and threw a potion at Andariel, making her scream in pain and lunge at them again.  
  
"AAAH!" As she tried to run away, Charon tripped over a dead body and fell onto her stomach. "SOMEBODY! HELP!"  
  
The female Lesser Evil flipped Charon into the air with her foot, sending the two girls flying in different directions. Charon crashed into the ceiling and fell to the floor in a big lump; Kitty knocked into an impaling stick and grunted as a rotting corpse slid on top of her.  
  
The sabercat shook her head, and her eyes focused just in time to see Andariel gearing up for another shot.  
  
"AAAAH!"  
  
"By the Lord of Zakarum!"  
  
Dakum appeared out of nowhere and blocked the entire blow. Charon gasped in disbelief.  
  
"You found me!" Charon cheered, jumping onto her feet.  
  
Niro hit Andariel with as many skeletons as he could muster, guzzling down mana potions by the bottle full. Jordan just rushed right in, brandishing an ax. Charon lifted Kitty onto her shoulders and threw potions like nobody's business. Kitty joined in by throwing choking potions, so Andariel was also posioned as well as her victims. Jordan cried out, and Andariel stepped back. He cried out again, and everyone felt a surge of power.  
  
"You will feel the wrath of a barbarian!" he howled, leaping up and shouting nonsense.  
  
He ran straight through Andi's legs. She didn't even flinch.  
  
Sherice cast her fireball. She ran out of mana, and so she went and charged Andariel, driving her staff into the demon's leg. Andariel let out a strange sounding "Reow!" of surprise, caught Sherice by her bottom left claw, and threw her into a wall.  
  
("Um, excuse me?" Author steps out. "Can I have a mini-rant here? Thank you. Now,  
  
I'm pretty sure someone has noticed this. In the original Diablo handbook, Andariel has feet like a piece of wood shaped like a cow's hoof. Is that a concept sketch? It must be; she's dressed semi-decently in that one. Anyway, also in the Expansion set handbook, Andariel has legs like a T-Rex. I think it's close, but I'm not sure it's just it, either. And, if you watch close enough in the game, it looks like Andi has T-Rex feet, but only has one toe! Is that weird? Someone help me clear this up. I'll shut up now, K? Okay. 'Bye-'Bye.")  
  
"One......last.....fireball!!" grunted Sherice.  
  
"SHERICE!" yelled Jordan in fear. Andariel closed in on her. Sherice backed into a corner.  
  
Charon roared and planted her scythe in Andi's back. She screamed and fell to the floor, her legs paralyzed. Charon yanked out her scythe, aimed one more swipe at her neck, and-  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Andariel screamed her death as fire coarsed from her body.  
  
Charon's eyes went wide, the spiraling fire display reminding her of the storm that ripped through her pride that fateful day. She shrieked in fear (in her own language, unintelligle to the humans), grabbed Kitty by the armpits, and hid behind Dakum, who gratefully sheltered her from the fire. It slowly died, leaving nothing but burn marks on the floor and zombies running around with their heads on fire.  
  
Jordan helped Sherice to her feet. He handed her a healing potion, which she guzzled down without a second thought.  
  
"Are you alright?" asked Jordan, holding her arm.  
  
"Yes," she answered, her voice shaking, "I've never seen a barbarian so dependent on his spells."  
  
"I've never met a sorceress who would charge into battle like you did," he marveled.  
  
"Hey, a town portal thing!" Charon examined the swirling blue vortex intensely. "Kitty, it's time to go back to town!"  
  
"Ba doh!" Kitty hugged Charon thankfully and clasped one pudgy hand around her tail.  
  
"Dakum, are you ready to come back?"  
  
Dakum and Niro sorted through the weapons Andariel had dropped. They payed the sabercat no mind.  
  
"Uh." Charon shrugged it off. "Sherice? Jordan? Town?"  
  
Sherice and Jordan also ignored Charon, lost in their own conversation.  
  
Charon looked at Kitty. "Sometimes you just wanna strangle them, don' cha?"  
  
"Ba ba da ba."  
  
"Whatever."  
  
She slipped through the town portal.  
  
WUHWUHWUHWUHWUHWUH!  
  
*****************************************************************  
  
"Meeko row pe-rroow, maow pre-rekoo mow treeoo serow! Mee meerow marow meow to krrrrrr meaw re-raow raow!"  
  
Kitty, not knowing sabercat language, just babbled along with the mews and purrs that crossed her ears. "Daba daba daba daba meke tong!"  
  
It was a celebration at the Rogue Camp, one that everyone was sure they would never forget. Ale and mead were drunk by the barrelful; Andariel was dead, and none were left unhappy.  
  
Dakum was particularly having fun by displaying his special talent; drinking Holy Water. Three mercenaries all sat around them, giggling and holding viles of Holy Water in their hands. The paladin raised his vile. "Alright, girls, watch me! This's all going straight down! Lord of Zakarum, give me the power!"  
  
And with that, Dakum guzzled down all of his very sizable bottle.  
  
The mercenaries gasped in surprise, then tried to copy the stunt. They quickly spat the water back out.  
  
"This water is foul!" gagged one.  
  
"It tastes flat, like water from a puddle!" spat another.  
  
Niro was accosted by Sherice, who was taking a bite out of a piece of sweet bread. "Tell me, Niro, what is that you're drinking?"  
  
"Healing potions!"  
  
Sherice raised an eyebrow. "Healing potions? Are you serious?"  
  
"Yep!" Niro took a big swig out of his bottle of red potion. "Keeps me strong and envigarated; keeps me poor as well."  
  
"Why don't you use that money on a wand for yourself?" Sherice placed her free hand on her hip, taking another bite of sweet bread.  
  
"Saving up for a good one. Like a grave wand, or something." Niro took another swig of healing.  
  
Charon yawned and told Kitty, "Well, I'm tired; I have to go to bed soon."  
  
"Me tah," Kitty yawned.  
  
"Today was scary, wasn't it, Kitty?" Charon began to remove the leather straps of her "armor", letting the soft animal hides underneath get some air. "All the blood and the gore and the 'ew'."  
  
"La." Kitty held up her arms.  
  
Charon checked the ring in her pocket. "Still, tomorrow, Dakum said we're going to the desert again!"  
  
"La!" Kitty thrust her tiny arms up even higher.  
  
"Sorry we couldn't find your momma, though." Charon removed the last bit of all the uncomfortable leather she was wearing. "Maybe this 'Diablo' guy has something to do with it-"  
  
"YEEEEEEAAAAAA!"  
  
Charon shrinked and saw what Kitty wanted; she want her breastplate taken off. Several rogues were also staring at the two; as Charon watched, Gheed comically tried to peek over the shoulder's of one of the mercenaries; she snapped him in the nose with her bow, and he fell to the ground knocked cold.  
  
"Eh." Charon quickly pulled off Kitty's breastplate, crown, and amulet. "We need to sleep now, Kitty. Say 'Neeoo rrrooo'."  
  
"Noru!" Kitty snuggled into Charon's lap and began to snore.  
  
"Yeah, I like that. Noru! Zzzzzzzzzz..."  
  
****************  
  
Dakum tiptoed out of his wagon, his armor shed to reveal his white undershirt and his favorite funny undershorts (inscripted with "Eat me!"). He checked the site to see Charon and Kitty, asleep on the grass in just the clothes they came with; Charon wore a stained tan peasant shirt and tight, knee length pants. Kitty wore a long, white shirt with brown, soft leather pants and, still, no shoes.  
  
Dakum took pity on the girls, sleeping outside on the cold ground. He tiptoed to them and tried to lift Kitty off of Charon's lap; the overgrown cougar growled as Kitty's weight was moved. Dakum bid a hasty retreat, but the sabercat had already awoken.  
  
"Huh, reeooski. Dakum?"  
  
"Charon, aren't you cold out here? " Dakum quickly retorted, making sure he did not make himself look like a fool.  
  
"It's warm out tonight," she mumbled, her eyes only half open. "Is's too wet, but is's warm. Is's a lot colder aaa... YAAAAAWWWWWwwnand dryer back home."  
  
"Why don't you bunk with me tonight?" Dakum kneeled down to Charon's level and held her hand/paw. "You can use my favorite funny blanket. My mother knitted 'Don't be a wet me' into it!"  
  
"Mmmnnnemmmeh. Okay."  
  
The kindly paladin helped Charon to her feet, lifting Kitty gently in his strong arms. He led them both to his wagon, where the girls slept comfortably on the hard wood floor.  
  
ACT 2 COMING UP SOON! 


End file.
